A few people talk and exchange experiences once the clock reaches eight pm, on the dot. Others write until they have to go home. I write until I’m about to drop.
I cannot stop writing, it is usually one of my most productive writing moments of the week. I often get “in the zone” and produce high quality work, writing hard up to nine or ten.
Pumped by a guilty late-night-coffee — which will most certainly keep me awake or make me have an agitated, unrestful night — I think the sacrifice is worth it. Every time I debate, to coffee or not to coffee…
Tonight I have churned some great paragraphs and ticked many items of my to-do list for a specific project.
Trying to write, publish and promote your own books while working full time is a little bit like trying to give birth while driving a horse-cart with a spooked stallion must be. Creating life, giving birth to characters, while your attention is constantly demanded elsewhere…
The road doesn’t end though, so I keep bouncing, reins in hand, YEEHAW!
Orble.com, a large community of bloggers, disappeared overnight taking with it years of work and sweat of thousands of writers.
What I find strange is that I couldn’t find anything explaining what happened. No chat over the internet, no emails advising it would happen.
It is so disrespectful to the writers. I know it was a free community but there is responsibility even if the currency wasn’t money. We have offered the community our most precious gift, our talents, passions in words. Even a post-the-fact announcement would have been better than nothing.
In my last statistics report, from the 27th August, 2015, one of my blogs “Aussie Folly” stated:
I am fortunate to have had all my writings backed-up offline but it still makes one sad to see the history, the work I have done, simply vanished. I noticed things were going badly once the special domains went offline and I managed to copy the main blog here.
In the end this has made me move to WordPress and learn how to make the best of it. It gave me incentive for the change and developing new blogging skills and knowledge.
If you have been an Orble blogger and knows anything of what have happened please post a comment. Just knowing more about it would help with the feeling of loss not only mine but of all the community members.
Over five years ago I took over a blog inside the Orble Community. I have also created a few others. I wrote in Writtenlife at least every 60 days to keep it active; I have accumulated 85 posts in total.
One day it simply went offline. I tried everything to get in contact with the community’s administration team and nothing worked. I posted inside my other Blogs (http://www.orble.com/orble-where-is-my-blog/) to try to get them to contact me but it seems they are running on automatic.
I find it very disrespectful. They let the domain name lapse and I couldn’t get it anywhere either because it is still registered to them or because someone else got it.
I decided to move everything across to WordPress. It has been a time consuming job, copying the text, finding the images (or as close as I could) inside my old files, noting how many votes I had in Orble, the date and time they were published. I wanted to keep as close as I could from the original for historical data.
But finally here it is! What a sense of achievement! This is the new blog, ready to receive my new writing thoughts.
I wonder if one day I will know what works and what doesn’t for me. In inspiration and writing, every time is different. I’m creating a new book, one written in English this time. But my inspiration and especially my confidence are fragile.
How much feedback is good? What to accept and what not. Sometimes I feel I don’t want to listen, unless it is positive. On the other hand there is a great benefit in listening, to the good and the bad, learning, adjusting, in finding the way.
I remember a time when you went out the house and you were simply out. You couldn’t contact anyone, unless you were going to their house and ring the doorbell. Or poke someone unless you employed your actual fingers.
I can certainly see the disadvantages such as getting anxious because you are running late and someone else is waiting for you. I know, and many others.
None the less, sometimes I miss it. I’ve just gotten an iPad and the other day I had it out for a walk, as it was settled in my bag; my mind was thoroughly unsettled.
I kept thinking, what am I going to do once the bus arrive? Something on my phone? Or setup my new iPad? perhaps listen to some music? Or some podcast, an audio book or audio program? Or possibly read my Kindle? What if I don’t do any of those?
This morning I was admiring this girl seated beside me. She was just seated, looking to the front. Nothing else. Really, she didn’t move, didn’t fiddle with her phone, or checked her Facebook, didn’t have headphones on. I felt like checking her pulse.
This sensation of “wasting time” is hard to shake and has been assaulting me when I’m walking, waiting for a transport, actually commuting, or simply with a few minutes to spare between an activity and other.
And then I don’t know why I feel so tired…
On the other hand I went to a workshop on how to use iWork on the iPad yesterday. I’ve felt like someone who has been cutting things with a piece of rock for years and was suddenly given a sharp, stainless steel, knife. The tool was so superior to what I had before it was like a light was turned on. Now I really get why people buy Mac and felt I have a knew knowledge to fire the old debate within me.
I woke up at five am today thinking what I could actually do with the thing…
And then I don’t know why I feel so tired…
So life is getting simpler with all these new objects and possibilities of connections that we have. All I have to do when I get home at night is to put my stuff to charge: my mobile, the iPod, the iPad, the iPad key board, the pocket wifi and the Kindle; eventually my iPod speakers and the photo camera too. Simple isn’t it?
So I’m in bed and I realise one of the things is running out of battery and not charging overnight? What am I going to do if I have a moment on the next day and the battery is flat?! Do I get up and plug it in?
Imagine I have released a new App for iPhones. My friend and I have developed it and it is called Minute Meditation App. More about that later.
So I had to register a few things on line to get it processed. You have to register in the Apple store then register a company with the taxation office than register that company for GST; answer some stuff about tax at the US, update your information, etc. To do that you need two things installed into your computer, and to install that you need a java something also installed to your computer and to run that you need an specific browser above a certain version. Then you get the browser installed, but each part of the process only functions with one browser, so I have Safari, Google Chrome, Explorer and Firefox open and to each installation I need only one of them functions. It was funny and bizarre, and sad and ridiculous, and absurd and unreasonable and yet wonderful. All at once. Because I kept saying:
“See and we say we are making life easier!”
To which my friend answered:
“Yeah, but in the past you would need to do all that in person and on foot.”
I keep wondering if they wouldn’t have made the process simpler because you had to be in person and on foot.
And then you could be walking to the official office, just by yourself, with nothing else to do other than carry the papers and get there…
In the end I feel technology is sometimes quite bittersweet!
The floor was a long way down, as far away from his mind as it was from his physical body.
The great thing of doing this was the focus required. It was his kind of meditation, clinging to a rock, reaching for the sky.
In this situation he found out the best was not thinking, just concentrating on where to put his hands, the next notch, his feet, clad in their special shoes which made possible for him to use a surface a third width of one needed for bare feet.
His mind was in the present. He could feel the wind, caressing his skin as a lustful lover would; the sun, creating the perfect temperature; the smell of the rock, so close to his nose; the noise of his own breathing and of the world’s inhaling. He was aware of each of his muscles, the tension was exhilarating, his legs were answering the challenge, he could feel his right biceps pushing against his forearm.
Suddenly he felt his stomach plunge, that feeling you get when you think it is possible you may fall. The realisation of how fragile your life is. At the same time there was a strange sensation mixed with it, the one he had only experienced the day before at the ruins. A strong knowing that there is much more out there and in him, a sense of connection to the whole, of being an unlimited being. It was so weird, like looking at the bottom of the well of yourself and seeing a galaxy there.
Then there was the bird. Flying over his had a millimetre far from his helmet. Bloody bird, he just hopped to be far enough from the chicks.
At the same instant he was acknowledging these feelings, along with the sensation of slightly releasing his grip on the rock, he realised all that was a consequence of a single thought.
A profound realisation; an answer to a question that had been plaguing him for the last few days.
He regained his focus, his strength, his sanity and continued up carrying The Answer with him.
Although I’ve been writing less here, I’m writing more in general. I’m on a new path now: I’m doing a Master of Arts in Creative Writing at UTS. I’m loving it. When you are “on purpose” and doing your passion it always goes well.
Funny thing is that I didn’t even know such thing existed! I’ve always wanted to do a masters degree but not of something that wasn’t a priority. As soon as a friend from a writer’s group told me about it, I went for it!
This blog and my website, I’m sure, helped me to get accepted for the program. The Advanced Narrative Writing classes taught by Rosie Scott are not only a high level technically, they are also great fun. I’m also on a Theory and Creative Writing class, where we talk about very strange notions, ininteligible texts, obscure writings and intelectual conundrums. All worth it.
The end result of the course is the writing of a novel. I was going to write a novel anyway, to have such a structure to guide me through it will be great. Being a migrant with English as a second language, I can grow much more for having this contact.
Again I feel privileged to be in Australia where there is a government program to support students. Had I not been here, I wouldn’t be able to be doing this right now with the easy I’m doing it.
I know this all looks too positive, suspiciously so, I could imagine, but it is how I really feel.
I have created a website from my writing. It may seem a bit crazy but the idea was “spoken” in a dream by my own voice inside my mind: “create a writer’s website”. www.taniacreations.com
Writing this website is like going on a road that you don’t know where it ends. It is unpredictable, with unfathomable results. Here I am investing in something I have no financial reasons to do but I am intuitively sure it had to be done.
It has been an interesting journey, becoming a full time writer… At the beginning I was terrified when people asked me:
– What do you do for a living?
Shaking I would answer in a very low voice “well… I’m a writer, trying to publish some books in Brazil”. And felt I could possibly die if anyone asked me:
– And is it possible to make a living out of it?
Now I am confident, smiley even. I’ve settle for the truth as I see it, not what my physical senses are telling me right now. I go for the reality I am creating:
– Of course it is!
Now I can scream out loud: I AM A WRITER, FULL TIME WRITER!!! You will be able to buy my books online (if you read Portuguese) very soon. But the next book will be written in English!
And you know what? The feedback I’m getting is wonderful. Every single person I talk to motivates me to go on.
This is the reality I am creating: walking in the sun recording my thoughts for future writing, spending the days (sometimes nights, sometimes weekends) writing.
I hope you enjoy the website, it is, literally, a dream come true!
This is my new Blog and my idea is to use the name of the site as its theme: writing about life. Mine and in general.
This is the best time to start something new: beginning of the year, just after vacations, writing about life now will be even easier…